Tags
There is a thing, a problem, an “issue” for the more politically correct crowd, that many believers deal with. It creeps in early, it dominates your thinking, it can literally sap the energy and life out of you; day by day, minute by minute, without you even knowing it! What is this thing, this monster, this life-taker? Perfectionism.
This hit home to those who were reared in a believer’s household, particularly elder’s kids. This thing creeps in where you have to be a certain way, you can’t show any cracks in the armor. It’s not like our parents sat us down and said, “Ok son, here’s how you wear an emotional mask…put it on good now, does that fit? Here’s how to make everyone believe that everything is fine in your life and you don’t have any struggles” They never did that, but it comes in as a subtle joy killer.
Perfectionism- the belief that I must be perfect in order to be a person of worth in people’s or God’s eyes. We all can say the trite phrases like, “No one’s perfect.” We can tell ourselves this often. But do we really hold that to be true, particularly after some moral failure? What do you do when you fail? Do you run from Jesus and others? Do you recoil from all relationships wondering why anyone would want such a mess as you? We are REALLY supposed to run to Jesus and find strength in community of other believers, enough strength to say, “I’m really not doing well right now, I messed up and I’m way more of a sinner that I first thought.” The perfectionist inside most of us tells us not to do this. He says to run the other way, beat yourself up for a few weeks, do some work to pay it off, you know?
How do we get out of the prison that is the perfectionist’s mind? Sunday we mentioned that your performance and your worth are two distinct things. Realize two things and you’ll be on the road: 1. We all fall desperately short of God’s glory everyday in ways which we are blind to and 2. Jesus was the perfect substitute for you! He was perfect and in that perfection, God the Father chooses to see that and count it as if you had been perfect. Realize that this doesn’t give us the permission slip to live however we want now, in fact it should do that opposite. Knowing that your relationship to God isn’t based on performing frees you up to see Him as He is: Gracious beyond all measure, not the taskmaster perfectionists make Him out to be.
I’ll close with the lyrics from Leonard Cohen’s Anthem.
“Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in.”
Mike Emlet, Christian counselor, points out that this sounds a lot like 2nd Corinthians 4. “But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show the surpassing power belongs to God and not us.” Your signs of weakness and failures let yourself and others see God’s awesome power in restoring and healing. If you’re like me and struggle with this; find a community of believers you trust enough to do some burden baring. AND- remember Christ is your righteousness, your perfect One.